Open-Ended Option

The weather forecast for Atlanta this week is (fucking) hot for the first part of the week and thunderstorm chances for the second part. It’s this weather forecast which inspired me to ride my bike home last night and back in to work this morning. Now I’m saddled with the decision… do I do it again today? This may be the last time this week that I get the option of riding to/from work.

All The Signs Were There
I am nothing if not stubborn enough to do something when I set my mind to it. That “something” yesterday was to ride my bicycle home from work. All of the signs were there telling me not to do so:

  • I broke one of the shoe laces on my biking shoes while putting them on. No problem, I re-laced the shoe with the remaining string.
  • I noticed that my tires were a bit low on pressure, but the bike pump was back in the office and I didn’t want to have to go back up there to pump the tires up. No problem, I’ll just ride home on the lower-than-optimal tires, I’m sure I’ve done it before.

About two miles into the ride, and while climbing my first incline, I felt that strange sensation that something bad had happened; it was a little regular thump coming from one of the tires. A flat? WTF? I quickly hopped off the bike and onto the sidewalk and confirmed my suspicion — the rear tire had lost all of its pressure. It didn’t take long for me to discover why as I saw the shine of a nailhead against the black rubber of the tire. I somehow managed to hit about a 1″ flathead nail and punctured the tire to the point where it came out the sidewall! Dangen!

I may be stubborn, but I’m usually also prepared. When road biking I always have a spare tube and a CO2 cartridge at the ready. So, I unpacked all of the shit from my seat bag, took off the rear tire (getting my fingers nice and greasy in the process), and proceeded to change my tube.

Because I had all of this stuff available in case of “emergency” you may rightly assume that I am not much of a risk-taker. So, I altered my route home and dropped by REI to pick up another new spare tube, a patch kit in hopes of repairing the two tubes I’ve blown recently, as well as a couple more CO2 cartridges (knowing that I already had two in my biking bag which was at work, and today I found that I had two more cartridges in my basement). I’m sure I looked like quite the sight entering REI in full Yoo-Hoo kit, still wearing my helmet, and sweating like a pig — but at that point I couldn’t have cared less.

Riding question. In order to get to REI yesterday I took the I-85 access road (old 85?) from Clairmont to REI and then from REI to North Druid Hills. Was this legal for me to do, or is that considered part of the interstate?

ITP Flickr Pic
What interests me most about whitewater rafting is the sub-culture of its guides.
The Kids Will Never Forget Their Guide
Just look at that guy and tell me that you don’t think he has a hundred stories to tell…

Oh How Lucky He Was
Last night’s Moonlight hash was hared by Davy Crochet and started at the Target on North Druid Hills. Because of my REI detour I rode near the start and even located a mark along my route. Oh, how I wished that I had a bag of flour or at least a little chalk to do some trail hijacking. On a bike I could have added a really fun YBF or count-back. 😉

Can We Put It To Rest?
For years I’ve called bullshit on this notion that women are not interested in looks and that they are seeking a “funny” man. I’d retort that if this were the case then why aren’t comedians getting laid all of the time.

I think the final and conclusive argument comes in the form of a fictional character — Don Draper. The amount of female lust I’ve seen about Draper (and probably John Hamm, the actor who portrays him) is phenomenal. Guess what. Draper is not funny! In fact, he may be the most unfunny leading man ever to grace the small screen and women want to screw his brains out. Why? I’ll tell you why. Because the man is good looking.

So the next time I’m told that looks don’t matter to women, I’m just going to reply with the two-word phrase — “Don Draper” and move along.

Stats & Goals
Daily
Current Mood – better, though still fighting the battle of the bulge
Current Music – silence
Website Of The Day – While I’ve said it ad nauseum I really am planning on doing iPhone/iPad development. The other day I help fund a Kickstarter project for Glyphish and in the process earned some icons which I can use in my upcoming applications.
Mode Of Transportation To Work – my bike
Exercise (b)Log – cycling, 17.2 miles
Morning Weigh-In – didn’t check
Pages Of 1001 Paintings You Must See Before You Die Read – 77

Monthly
Foot Mileage – 0 miles, Wheel Mileage – 50.7 miles
Pushups – 0, Situps – 0
Consecutive Days Of Bed-Making (Longest Streak) – 2 (6)
Vegetarian Days – 1, Carnivorous Days – 8
Marta Rides To Work – 0
Bike Rides To Work – 2

August Goals
– Not to get sick for the entire month (I did it once, I can do it again!)
– Not get fired from my job
– Ride my bicycle no fewer than 200 miles
– Get the Sharpened Stone, LLC moving further
– Complete at least one iPhone application (seriously, this needs to happen)
– Completely plan out my August/September Colorado trip

2010 Goals
– Reduce my weight to 185 pounds (starting weight was 198 pounds) [update: On July 1 I’ve sadly gained weight; I’m at 203 pounds]
– Completely read the book 1001 Paintings You Must See Before You Die
– Earn at least $150 through photography sales in order to cover the cost for the renewal of the Sharpened Stone.
– Save $500 for the sole purpose of donating to charitable organizations of my choice
– Attend at least one professional photography workshop
– Enter no fewer than three photographic competitions / gallery showings
Get the Black Sheep stats out of Excel and online
– Ride in no fewer than two 50 mile or 50K bike rides
– Complete my Taco Mac Passport requirement of 125 beers

The Unmeasurable
– Continue backing up all data, including the off-site storage
– Become a proficient programmer in PHP and CSS Objective-C
– Do not create a solution for something which is not a problem

Cheers,
Paulie [eatl/ga]

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14 Responses to Open-Ended Option

  1. Martha says:

    You’re a better man than me…I would have limped back to my car and drove home if I had gotten a flat. I stopped by REI as well yesterday, bought $20 worth of gels. I didn’t realize that if you buy 12 or more they are 20% off…plus the Power Bar stuff was on sale. I tried a yummy fruit smoothie power bar.

    I see cyclist on the access road, along with pedestrian and bus stops so I would guess it is not part of the interstate and you were legal.

    Don’t throw all us women together…I’ve never watched Mad Men, so I have no option about DD. Who women fantasizes about is not the guy they want to bring home…I had a BIG crush on Billy Idol (still do) but I wouldn’t want to date him? Are you kidding? What works for the guy on stage (or screen) rarely translate well into real life.

  2. Oh, I thought about walking my bike back to my car and then driving over to the REI near my office. Have I mentioned that I am a stubborn man? 😉

    I’ve seen the sign saying that when you buy 12 or more you receive a 20% discount, but I can never commit to buying that many; it’s like admitting I have a problem. And then there was my “dinner” last night which consisted of — iced tea and a Clif bar (Maple Nut). Who am I kidding, I do have a problem.

    While I shouldn’t have lumped all women into one category the whole “women seek funny men” has frustrated me because I swear the reason I’ve not dated much is that I’m not good looking enough for the women in whom I have interest. In fact, I just remembered that someone broke up with me because she decided that I wasn’t handsome enough. Whatever…

  3. Stacy Fox says:

    Yeah, I’m not a Draper fan either. In fact, I have folks like Gary Sinese on my Top 5 list. We’re not all the same, we women. Trust me.

    That access road is fine for bikes. 🙂 And I agree with Martha: I would have cried and then limped back to my car. Still crying. Well done!

  4. Martha says:

    I bought 18 gels and 2 power bars…I did feel a little strange. At least I knew they weren’t all just for me.

    All I can say is, I’ve went out with all kinds of men, some better looking, some funnier, some kinder, some smarter, some none of the above 🙁 ..I really don’t think women are nearly as concerned about looks as men are…believe went Jerry is getting on my last nerves it isn’t his looks that get him out of trouble 😉
    Sometimes you have to try something different, go out with someone that isn’t ‘your type’ and just see what happens!

    Anyone that won’t go out with someone, based solely on looks (money, status, etc.), is someone lacking character, but that’s just my option. (now I sound like a mom)

  5. Barb says:

    Martha – you do sound like a mom, but it is so true…….. basing everything on looks only works for the really rich. (but I always assume they have someone else that they really want to be with on the side)

    Paulie – Don Draper is a fictional character, and yes, he is attractive, but he is a fictional character. I’ve got plenty of TV crushes, but that is all it is.

    and – I bet most comedians get plenty of women.

    This quote above bothers me:
    “While I shouldn’t have lumped all women into one category the whole “women seek funny men” has frustrated me because I swear the reason I’ve not dated much is that I’m not good looking enough for the women in whom I have interest.”
    Have you even talked to any of these women? From most of your blog posts, you haven’t. If you don’t talk to them, you will never know.

  6. I probably shouldn’t admit this in public, but most of my dating escapades occurred pre-blog. I’ve not been much of an outgoing, happy-go-lucky person since I’ve started writing this. Come to whatever conclusions you want from this admission.

  7. Steve says:

    You were perfectly legal to be on the access road.. sidewalks, bus stops, BIKE SHOP, etc, are perfectly happy being on the access road.

    And I shant wade into the funny vs. handsome debate. Suffice it to say I’m glad I know women who like funny men.

    This morning’s lesson in farm ownership- don’t forget to turn the water off when trying to top off the pool. If you do forget, you get a nice muddy pool and you get the pleasure of meeting the well man and paying him $175 to fix the well.

    Even the proper air pressure could not have kept you from the flat time, only vigilence and amazing eyesight.

    -FP

  8. Barb says:

    oh Steve – that sucks about the pool.

  9. Steve says:

    I’ll say.. especially with the hash coming over in 10 days.

  10. debbie says:

    Funny trumps handsome every time…. now funny and handsome works, too. Maybe you’re just not funny. 😉

    Our pool looks like a pond, gross. I need a new pool boy…

    That guide is a bit scary looking. The guide on my raft trip a week ago was HOT (but not terribly funny 🙂 )

  11. Steve says:

    I need a new pool boy too… hey, wait a minute, I AM the pool boy!!! 🙂

    I repaired my internet connection by disconnecting the IP Phone box and I think I shall be having some strong words for the Charter folks.

  12. Steve, you should hire a cabana boy for your pool services, because you actually have a cabana!

  13. Jenka says:

    Re: Don Draper, you’re comparing apples to oranges. Funny and good-looking are 2 separate categories, out of many combinations. Women don’t care WHAT Don Draper says. It’s not about that. Nor do they necessarily want to date him, either, considering he’s not exactly monogamy material. But a funny guy is a totally different animal. A woman might or might not want to date him, but the funny at least gets him in the door no matter what he looks like.

    And for the record, my hubby isn’t super good-looking, nor is he all that hilarious. But I love him anyway!

  14. After reading comments all day I’ve come to the conclusion that since I’m not having sex I must neither be funny nor good looking. At least I have my health, wait, I don’t have that either! Dangen!

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