Ouch, I Did It Again

If I could change one thing about my hashing experience it would be the regularity of which I turn/sprain my ankles. Yesterday while cruising along I took one misstep and rolled the living Hell out of my left ankle — popping sound effects were provided at no extra cost. I hobbled my way through the remainder of the trail and returned home to begin the painful recovery process of RICE (Rest. Ice. Compression. Elevation.) With the Cartersville Century ride on my calendar for Saturday I will be out of commission for the remainder of this week in hopes that I’ll be strong enough for the ride.

Read Along With Me
Today’s passage from Notes To Myself.

I must do these things in order to communicate: Become aware of you (discover you). Make you aware of me (uncover myself). Be ready to change during our conversation, and be willing to reveal my changes to you.

For communication to have meaning it must have a life. It must transcend “you and me” and become “us.” If I truly communicate, I see you in a life that is not me and partake of it. And you see and partake in me. In a small way we then grow out of our old selves and become something new. To have this kind of sharing I cannot enter a conversation clutching myself. I must enter it with loose boundaries. I must give myself to the relationship, and be willing to be what grows out of it.

To all who have helped me — Thanks.

Just Call Me Rain Man
On Saturday morning I went to Oakland Cemetery to take photos. It rained.
On Sunday I went hashing. It rained.

Sadly, neither weather event provided a whole lot of rain, nor did they cool temperatures significantly.

“Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits”
Words by which to live. These of course are the seven words which cannot be said on broadcast television. George Carlin made them popular. George Carlin died yesterday. There goes another one of the legends with whom I am rather familiar. I’ve just gained one more notch on my “Live For Today” belt.

ITP Flickr Pic
This was not the shot I had intended on using today.
Bobby Jones
However, with the news of Carlin’s death it just seemed to be the “appropriate” shot for the day.

The Bread Is A Lie
I made the Amish Friendship “bread” with great success this weekend. While I realized that this “bread” was not “bread” but more of a muffin or cake I didn’t realize just how much it would make. I quickly found out that the recipe as stated would make one 9″ round cake pan plus two ramekins worth of “bread.”

I’ve got three batches of “starter” underway, one of which will be turned into another “loaf” of “bread” next weekend. I only hope that this process doesn’t expand my waistline along with my knowledge of Amish “bread” baking.

In other news, one of my coworkers gave me a jar of Apple “butter” on Friday. I think that I will spread some of the “butter” onto the “bread” and call it “breakfast.”

Always Know Rule #1 Of Barbecuing
What is Rule #1? Always check the amount of propane in you tank in order to guarantee a sufficient amount is on hand.

I didn’t follow Rule #1 and nearly paid for it on Saturday night. I started a London Broil along with two potatoes, and had two ears of corn still in their husks awaiting their turn on the heat. After about ten minutes I went to check on the cooking process and saw, to my horror, that the cavity of the barbecue was nowhere near my desired temperature. At that time I also noticed that the flame had gone out. A quick inspection of the tank of propane explained why — I was out of gas.

Against my desire I cranked up the oven (for the second time on Saturday) and cooked indoors. The meal was delicious, but I really need to continue to cook outside until air conditioning has returned to the domicile.

RealiTV Update: The Next Food Network Star
First let me say that from what I see none of these contestants will be Food Network “stars”, but I digress…

On last night’s episode the contestants are introduced to current Food Network start Tyler Florence and Michael Simon.

For the Tyler Florence segment the contestants much produce a minute’s worth of instructional video using an ingredient which is revealed to them prior to making the video. I feel for the contestants because one minute is barely enough time to pull this off, and few even come close. The highlight of the contest (because it was so bad) had to be Nipa and her inability to clean a squid. We learn a lot about Nipa, our mid-western Indian girl, in this contest. First, we see that she is absolutely squeamish about touching seafood (more on this later) and second, she obviously has never eaten squid. The second revelation is apparent when she yanks the head, tentacle, and guts from the squid and proceeds to “clean” the squid by ignoring the body (the most commonly eaten portion) and then trimming a small piece from the remaining portion and presenting that as the finished product. The Tyler Florence segment also shows us why Jennifer won’t win. Jennifer suffers from the same lack of confidence that I do — which is one of the many reasons that I won’t be the next Food Network star.

For the next challenge Michael Simon (who last year became the new Iron Chef through a similar process) greets the contestants. The contestants must take one fish and prepare it two ways — one conventional way, and one Iron Chef way using a bizarre added ingredient. As an added “bonus” the “best” dish will be featured on Red Lobster‘s menu and I am reminded why I haven’t eaten at Red Lobster in over twenty years. During the fish selection and preparation we see that Nipa has a hell of a time picking up a dead trout and also has no idea how to fillet a fish! WTF?! This contest produced many “misses” and a couple of “hits” as far as the food was concerned. We also got to witness Lisa slip and fall because her choice of cooking shoes is incredibly impractical.

In the end the selection committee narrows the elimination targets down to two — Nipa and Adam. I fear that Adam and his “over the top” antics are finally going to cost him, but apparently the judges must have watched the tape of Nipa’s inability to do anything with seafood and give her the boot. For some reason this pleased me greatly, after all she did already quit once and got a reprieve.

And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal…
Current Mood – bummed
Current Music – Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing The Dandy Warhols — “Not If You Were The Last Junkie On Earth”
Website Of The Day – Over the weekend I was introduced to a great little shot for bargain camping gear called The Gear Revival. If you live in Atlanta and do outdoorsy things, then I suggest you find them and do some shopping there.
Exercise (b)Log – walking/running, 4 miles
Monthly Foot Mileage – 22.75 miles
Monthly Wheel Mileage – 38 miles
Mode Of Transportation To Work – My car
Monthly Marta Rides – 22
Consecutive Days Of Bed-Making (Longest Streak) – 82 (82)
Books To Read To Earn Kindle – 5

June Goals
1) Run no fewer than 75 miles
2) Ride no fewer than 100 road miles
3) Ride Marta no fewer than twenty times (ten round-trips)
4) Read at least one book
5) Make my bed every day
6) Eat out at a bar/restaurant no more than twice in one week

Cheers,
Paulie [eatl/ga]

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31 Responses to Ouch, I Did It Again

  1. Attention early morning readers: I just realized that I forgot my Next Food Network Star RealiTV Update. I am adding it right now…

  2. Another comment by me!

    @Willy: While packing up the Nikon D50 for your purchase I also remembered that I have a IR remote for the camera that doesn’t work with my D300 so I will throw it into the deal for no extra cost. When do you want to do the deal?

  3. Martha says:

    I know this will shock you but I fell off my bike this weekend, no bruise (at least not yet) but I do have a lovely skinned knee for my troubles. The best part is, did I do it mt. biking, flying down some steep, rocky hill, or hashing (wheelhopper) in traffic, nope not that either….I was trying to do a u-turn on the Sliver Comet…god I’m a klutz.

    I think I’m going to skip running tonight also, I’m gambling that tomorrow will be our long run for boot camp.

    I’m going to have to check out that shop, looks pretty cool. I really need to get a shed built this summer to store all my stuff. If I cook enough amish bread do you think I can get a ‘shed rasing’ going?

    FYI I tweeked my bread this weekend…made one lemon and another brown sugar/butterscotch…that is really rich.

  4. The Gear Revival is *really* small, but they have a lot of stuff. They buy stuff from other stores and resell it at a discount when compared to the retail price. You will like it, I am sure. I’ll probably go back soon.

    You? Fell? 🙂

    I tweaked the recipe by adding mixed nuts and raisins — that was a good idea on my part. The next round of Amish bread that I make will use apple sauce instead of oil. It won’t make it healthy, but I’ll feel better about eating so much of it.

  5. willy says:

    Paulie, I can do the deal asap. Going to Braves tonight, you probably will not be at G,s Wed……so how about Tuesday P.M.? LMK……. will have cash in plain brown envelope Willy

  6. Sal says:

    Paulie: When I made mine, I also used applesauce instead of oil. Comes out pretty good. There are some recipes that don’t use the pudding too. And you can tweak the recipe so you don’t end up with 3 starters that you have to find friends to give it to.

    Who all is riding Cartersville this week-end? I am still debating it.

  7. Stacy says:

    Oh no! Cartersville is this weekend already? How did THAT happen?! I’m not going to be able to meet y’all anymore… I’ll be out of town.

    Wow, where on earth is this summer going already?!

  8. Martha says:

    Sal, as far as I know Paulie, myself, Brad & Primer will be there along with a few other ‘non-hashing’ friends. It looks like Stacy has better things to do? 😉

    I’m experimenting with the amish bread, I froze half my starter to see how it fairs. I was musing the applesause this weekend but it would have meant a trip to the store that I just wasn’t up for. I may cut back on the sugar a bit also next time.

    Paulie did either of yours fall in the middle? Maybe not since you used a round pan and not a loaf. My first batch only one did this, the last one both did? Very odd.

  9. @Willy: Tuesday or Wednesday works for me. I will be at George’s since my hurt ankle won’t slow my drinking. I’ve been using Betsy as proof that I can do it!

    @Stacy: Booo Hisss! I could tell the world where your summer is going but that’s for you to do on your blog. 😛

    @Sal: I’ll be playing a lot with this recipe (until I get on the scale again).

    @Martha: Fall in the middle? No, in fact just the opposite. The 9″ round pan rose up cylindrically, luckily it did not escape the pan. The two I cooked in ceramic ramekins plumped up like a huge muffin.

    I will be riding with those listed by Martha above. My ankle will hurt. It will probably slow me down, but I’ll have Amish Friendship Bread to work off.

  10. Stacy says:

    Not better, just different! 🙁 I’m so sorry guys: I really wanted to meet up with y’all and support you on one of these (key word = SUPPORT, not JOIN the madness). But, yeah, R.’s got his family reunion this weekend, in a moment of pure madness I said, “sure, that sounds like fun!”, so I’m about to be thrown to the wolves. At least it’s up in the Smoky’s so I’ll be slaughtered in a beautiful setting.

    This Amish bread y’all keep talking about is making me hungry though! Mmmm. Maybe I oughta ditch him afterall with the promise of some of that being around… 😉

  11. Barb says:

    Sal, we could carpool, but remember, especially after your week of BRAG, you will smoke me, so you may need to bring extra refreshments while you wait on my slow ass.

    Martha – U-turns can be hard 😉

    Paulie – you will laugh at this – Little Easy was DFL at Wheelhopper yesterday. Poor guy, said he got on an old SOB trail, and then was all by himself much later at the screwed up section near Turner Field. Note to all hares – laying trail in the morning before a baseball game means people can not find your marks when the game is happening……

    You guys are making me me almost, I say almost, want to bake with all this bread talk.

  12. debbie says:

    I just got a wailing email from Steve (aka ITP-Reader Steve) can no longer access ITP.com from work. Paulie apparently you are not Fed-approved.

    I’m with Barb, y’all need to share the Amish cake bread love, notice I said the cake bread, not the starter! I’ve never had much luck baking although he who cannot read this keeps trying to get me to practice more.

  13. Martha says:

    ugh, I forgot to ask what happend with Little Easy, I was going to call Michelle but I figured I would let her cool off a little before broaching the subject.

    We drove around Turner Field and checked south of town (the power ling cut), I even thought I might find him in my back yard, having a cold one. Brad didn’t realize we were so close to my house, if he had known he might have bagged the rest of the trail.

    Maybe I can get off at an earlier Marta stop on Wednesday and ride by George’s on my way home…if nothing else it will curtail the beer drinking a bit.

  14. I’ve made the Big Time — I’ve been blocked! Maybe it was all the curse words with which I’ve littered this space?

    I’ll make a couple of “breads” and share the love…. Lord knows that I don’t need to keep eating all of this stuff myself.

  15. Martha says:

    Debbie, make a request and I will try to fill it. I should be ready to bake again by next Wednesday … so I might be able to drop something off with Steve at George’s.

    I love to bake (i’m not super good at it) but I never know what to do with the finished product, lord knows I don’t need to eat it.

  16. Barb says:

    Yep – all the curse words must be why you are blocked.

    I think the long forgotten idea of leaving a map to the end at the start might have to start again for wheelhopper (especially urban assaults). I don’t think the out of town trails it would matter…..

    Stacy has a boyfriend. She will soon forget all about us, we will never see her again…….. (just kidding)

  17. Stacy says:

    Hey, Paulie, do you remember how you were blocked at my last place of employment but we did something that still let me in? Maybe that can work for ITP-reader Steve, too?

    I think the .com extension would be blocked but somehow you did something and if I went through as .net I could get in. Or something like that. Do you remember what I’m talking about?

  18. Stacy says:

    No no, Barb, it’ll be the other way around: I’ll be inviting y’all out for pool parties! Of course, it’s waaaaaaaaay out in the country so I doubt anyone would come. :-p (Especially when I let Paulie know that R.’s a huge Tennessee fan and is converting me to the Orange side…the one without the pretty blue…)

    As for the map / hash thing, I’ve actually have had to stop doing some hashes (read: Southern Comfort) since the maps / directions weren’t there and I couldn’t find my way without it. (I tried!!) But on the same note, I’ve completely forgotten to do the same thing when I’ve hared. Should really start encouraging that agin.

  19. Sal says:

    Barb: we can discuss later this week…..not sure if I will ride the century or not…then you would be waiting on me!

    The last time I baked the Amish so called bread…I made it in a bundt pan…makes an excellent bundt cake!

  20. I own InsideThePerimeter.com which currently just redirects to InsiderThePerimeter.net. That’s how we got around your problem Stacy.

    > (Especially when I let Paulie know that R.’s a huge Tennessee fan and is
    > converting me to the Orange side…the one without the pretty blue…)

    You are dead to me.

  21. debbie says:

    Martha – your post about the brown sugar/butterscotch additives sounded excellent! Yes, ITP-reader Debbie will shamelessly troll for Amish bread/cake. 🙂

    I’ll email ITP-reader (wannabe) Steve about trying .net. He’s probably working on scaling this particular firewall as we type.

    Don’t kill off Stacy! After all some of your readers (ok, maybe only 1) are UGA fans/alum.

  22. Policy states that she *must* be dead to me. It’s not only that she’ll be rooting for Tennessee it’s because she

    a) Didn’t go to Tennessee
    b) Was rooting for my beloved Gators
    c) Is being swayed by this OTP Guy for whom she is turning her back on us

    See, it’s not just because it’s a different SEC school. :p

  23. Barb says:

    My one rule about rooting for a school you didn’t attend – I will let you root for them, but you can NEVER say WE.

  24. Very funny Barb. The use of “we” when watching sports irritates me because the person saying it is neither playing for the team currently, nor has ever played for the team being watched.

  25. Steve says:

    Good new from inside the protected space of the FRB… they might try to keep us in, but they just can’t. Thanks Paulie for the other way in..

    And a memory of George Carlin. I owned a copy of “Class Clown” and when I got it home, was playing it on the stereo with my dad asleep in the adjacent chair. I don’t believe I have ever moved so fast to turn the volume down as when “shitpissfuckcuntcocksuckermotherfuckerandtits” came blaring out of the speakers.

    -FP

  26. Stacy says:

    Yay! I like debbie! debbie’s trying to keep me from being dead! Thanks, girl!

    Now, in my defense, I would NEVER give up my Badgers. The rule to supporting the Vols is that he has to support my Badgers or Game Off (as in I’m no longer supporting him; not that we’d break up. Although…). But since I didn’t go to a school in the South and pretty much chose Florida at random…well, I guess I can be persuaded to change for the right reason. Except by an ACC fan, which I think we ALL can agree on.

    Barb, I can agree with you on that too. I am pretty darn sure I’ll never “we” a Tennessee comment.

  27. Martha says:

    Debbie you’ve got it.

    I will try to coordinate my next batch with either a Wednesday night or sunday run.

  28. Sorry but IMnotsoHO there is no “right” reason for cheering for a school that one did not attend. Your cheering for the Gators was convenient for me because so many in this town are against them.

  29. Stacy says:

    So if you met and, say, fell in love with someone who went to a Pac 10 school, you wouldn’t cheer for her team with her? Or if you had kids who went somewhere in the Big 12, you couldn’t support them? (notice I’m not forcing you to choose against your own conference here)

    If this were the case, I shouldn’t even be able to root for the Badgers. Sure, I went to the University of Wisconsin, but at Stevens Point, not Madison. Because I couldn’t go to “THE” school, does that mean I can’t support them either?

  30. That is what I am saying. 😛 Besides, falling in love and having children are theoretical concepts to me so it’s not something about which I have to worry.

    In other news….

    I will most likely have some new Amish cake bread with me on Sunday…. unless I crash early from riding 55 miles in Cartersville and don’t get around to making it.

  31. Barb says:

    So, Allan says to me today at lunch – “Where do we want to going riding on Sunday?” (he’s working Saturday, no Cartersville for him). And I’m thinking…… will my legs even want to ride on Sunday? I hope so, or we will be in search of someone’s pool to crash…..

    And – will someone make me a tshirt that says on the front & back – ALLAN’S AT THE FIREHOUSE! I bet I was asked 15 times why he wasn’t at wheelhopper. Or – should I mess with everyone and just start answering – We are getting a divorce and I got Wheelhopper in the settlement.

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