59:00

When I discuss the possibilities of riding Marta to/from work I usually tell people that the reason I don’t is because it takes about an hour to go one way. This morning I clocked it and house-to-office took exactly fifty-nine minutes. It would have taken longer had I not hustled to catch a westbound train.

Read Along With Me
Today’s passage from Notes To Myself.

This: It is such a chore to talk to Bill. Why is he such a drag?

Versus this: I make such a chore for myself when I talk to Bill. How do I make it so hard?

To all who have helped me — Thanks.

All Hail Trey Parker And Matt Stone
By now you should know that Trey Parker and Matt are the creators of South Park (Jeebus how much money have those guys made by now). Last night I finally gotten around to watching last week’s South Park episode. I was eagerly anticipating this episode because I had heard much hype about it on the Internets because the plot was based around said Internets.

The episode was a wonderful parody of the migration of families to Californy (as it was pronounced) when the internet “ran dry” in South Park; it included families getting herded into Internet Refugee Camps and being allocated time slices during which they were allowed to access the internet.

Further enjoyment came for this nerd (me) when they showed “The Internet” as being one gigantic Linksys router in the middle of the desert — much like any science fiction movie from the 50’s or 60’s. And I nearly busted a gut laughing when the government official asked the computer science nerds about the problem and there answer was “See that blinking orange light? It should be solid green.” because that same statement has rattled through my brain when my own internet connection has died in the past.

Kudos to you South Park creative team!

[update: I forgot to mention that you can now watch episodes of South Park, including this brilliant one, at South Park Studios]

If I Could Only Define “Loved One”
In my electronic mailbox yesterday I was delivered a letter which said that I could save 10% off the purchase of a Road ID if I entered the code PCMAY58 when I checked out of their electronic store before May 5th.

Road ID was the company I was seeking but never located at the ING Runners’ Expo a month ago. Since then I’ve come very close to purchasing a $20 ID bracelet (at full price) but have been unable to supply a name and phone number of someone to call in case of emergency. In and of itself this conundrum has swirled me into a depressed state each time I contemplate making the purchase. I may jump on the 10% offer soon and just put “Someone who gives a damn” in that space and see what happens.

ITP Flickr Pic
Taken at Rock City.

I somewhat see it as a metaphor for my life. I wish to soar, but am being held back. The metaphor breaks down when I realize that I am not cast in stone and that I am the one holding myself back and not some physical chains — but I think you get my point.

The Price Of Gas Is Making Me Move My Ass
Today I make my first attempt at the “Grand Experiment.” I will be foregoing the pleasantries of hanging at George’s tonight because of caloric and monetary constraints. Instead I have packed running clothes and lugged them into the office with me this morning. The idea is that I will change into these clothes before leaving the office, take the train, exit at a station some number of miles from my car, and then run to my car. I should be able to do a sufficient run, and by the time that I get to my car I will have completed my workout for the evening. W00t! I’ve also packed a change of shirts in the car so that I won’t be all sweaty as I drive home. Now if I had only remembered to leave the towel in my trunk…

Meet My Chumby
I found out that on the Chumby website that I could create a virtual Chumby. If you sit and watch it for a while you can actually see all of the apps that I am running on my Chumby.

Sadly I had to settle for the “latte” model, as the black one was not a virtual option.

RealiTV Update: Hell’s Kitchen
On last night’s Hell’s Kitchen someone burns their right hand so badly that they may Never. Cook. Again. Dramatic enough for you?

Last night we watched the Red v. Blue make pasta as quickly as they could in order to win their reward challenge. The pasta was being prepared for Hell’s Kitchen’s first ever “family service” (read “annoying children, some of which should not be eating a big meal, never mind inquiring about cookies”). We see each team literally crank out pasta and then break what I hope is some California Food Preparation Law by hanging it dry off the arms and shoulders of a teammate. Ramsay checked and weighed each team’s effort and we see the women come out ahead again. The women get a shitty reward of going to a two-bit amusement park and the guys get lashed with wet noodles the entire time they are forced to prep for the early evening’s festivities. To further rub at least one of the guys’ noses in shit, the mustachioed one whose name I think is “Ben” has to go outside and shovel shit. Ben is visibly upset, but then quickly realizes that if he wins Hell’s Kitchen he’ll be shoveling Ramsay’s shit for awhile so he sees it as early on-the-job training.

As the families pile in to Hell’s Kitchen the heat is on. The first team to complete order service (apparently “Quality is not Job #1” on this night as Ramsay has already determined that he will not be “shutting it down” tonight) will be declared the victor. Not long into service Vanessa gets a major motherfucking “owie” by accidentally pouring scalding oil onto her hand. She is rushed to the ER and all looks bad for the ladies. Fear not though ladies as the men on this season are as incompetent as they come — Craig can’t cook fresh pasta, Ramsay berates and hates Ben, and Matt likes to serve up chicken raw (You could KILL somebody! You donkey!). And just like that the ladies, who were one man down, pull out the victory.

Weak links Craig and Matt are identified as potential sacrificial lambs, but Ramsay wants to berate Ben a little more and calls him into the firing line as well. Hilarity ensues when the men attempt oneupmanship by throwing out trite percentage guarantees “I’ll give you 100% chef!” “I’ll give you 125%!” and then Craig says “I’m not good with percentages… but I’ll give you more.” Apparently Ramsay is all about the numbers because Craig (who is deserving of getting a Ramsay boot up his ass) is kicked off the show.

And now for some ideas stolen from LiveJournal…
Current Mood – fair
Current Music – Sirius Satellite Radio, Channel 26 playing Sea Wolf — “Winter Windows”
Website Of The Day – Inventor Spot is an interesting highlighting gadgets that are being invented marketed.
Exercise (b)Log – sit-ups, push-ups, dumbbell curls
Monthly Foot Mileage – 43.5 miles
Monthly Wheel Mileage – 0 miles
Mode Of Transportation To Work – Marta
Monthly Marta Rides – 1
Consecutive Days Of Bed-Making (Longest Streak) – 25 (25)

April Goals
1) Run no fewer than 75 miles
2) Ride no fewer than 100 road miles
3) Ride Marta no fewer than ten times (five round-trips)
4) Read at least one book
5) Make my bed every day

Cheers,
Paulie [eatl/ga]